| (no subject) |
[Aug. 5th, 2006|11:45 am] |
sitting here
thinking deep
looking for a way
but finding no escape
escape for these thoughts
escape from these thoughts
only one thing fills them
and I don't want to flush
flush the memories and thoughts
thoughts of her and me
but obviously we won't be
why can't I divert
forget
move on
change thought
I sit tranquil
nothing matters
the world is still
sounds become noise
noise becomes vibrations
vibrations become images
images that escape
escape from my mind
I try not to let my thoughts fall
but I let them spill
onto the page
showing you my mind
but when true emotions are revealed
those are the ones that when expressed
can be translated into anyones life
people see their thoughts through your escape |
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| Hooray! |
[Aug. 4th, 2006|10:43 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  optimistic | ] |
I get paid today!
so happy
finally getting out of debt
I was getting sick of not be able to eat
I was getting sick of having to put my car in neutral downhill to save gas
I was getting sick of missing a lot of stuff
but it's getting better
I'm happy for that part of life...
but girls...
still...
ehh...
:-\
shit
so it'll balance out...
hopefully I get more good than bad out of the day
<3 |
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| twismy |
[Jul. 22nd, 2006|02:17 am] |
New Job @ Ritz Camera
Currently not allowed @ Mojo Bean (due to bulletin bullshit)
Parents leaving out of town @ Noon
I feel like a greyhound @ the racetrack chasing the rabbit
Haha @ me and my lameness
<3 and ;) @ you |
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| what the fu................ |
[Jun. 26th, 2006|12:37 am] |
alright...so a lot has happened since my last entry...
I no longer work @ Hollister...
that job sucks...
I work at Holy Grounds Coffee Lounge...
but I haven't gotten paid!
wtf??
I no longer live @ home...
Terry (step-dad) is gay...
I live with Nik and Jovan's family...
it's different.
wtf?
I was talking to an AMAZING girl for a while...
but then I guess I did something wrong...
She said she wasn't ready for a relationship...
but then she turns and gets this guy!
wtf?
so recap...
I'm kicked out of my house
I lost the perfect girl
and I have no money...
WTF!???
this sucks...
I'm gonna try to clear it up with a shower and some sleep |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 26th, 2006|02:57 am] |
so I got the new Taking Back Sunday album...
=] it's good!
I also had an interview at Hollister today...
so hopefully I'm working by the week's end
but other than that the only thing I've been able to think about is girls
omg...it's like going through puberty...
I hate how dependant I've become on a woman's touch...
how I long for it...
but I have no one to hold
I feel like such a dog for having all of these thoughts flooding my mind...
but I still give women all the respect they deserve from me
I'm going crazy! |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 24th, 2006|03:17 pm] |
life if confusing...
but I'm sure that is an obvious
I hate desicions
esp. when emotions are involved...ick
I hate feeling like a bad guy when I make a desicion that is good for me...
but that makes someone else sad...
those are the worst!
I hate this daily game we all play
I can't wait to go on tour...then I'll be free
but until then...I must wear this mask that saves feelings
I know that I'm not hideous behind that mask...
I would just not be seen as "such a gentleman"
............. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 23rd, 2006|11:31 pm] |
sometimes the cons outweigh the pros...
but what can you do but do what you must? |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 22nd, 2006|03:17 am] |
I have the biggest fuckin' headache ever
I hope I'm not getting the same problems that my mom had
::knock on wood::
cause she ended up having a brain tumor removed
shit
I hope it's just from staring at this computer screen for too long |
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| so like... |
[Apr. 21st, 2006|01:19 pm] |
I still don't have a job! and it's killing me...
I've been living off of photography and merch tips...
I've been doing alright...but now it's time to pay my bills!
omfg...I'm gonna go bankrupt!
I need a job...like...now! and paycheck like yesterday!
grrr...
well...I'm sure I'll find one soon
other than that...I know really know what else to say...
extreme thing and the battle are soon...those should be fun
and I should be going on a 2 week tour with FM next month...so I'm stoked |
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| been a long time...shouldn't of left you w/o a dope beat to step to... |
[Apr. 20th, 2006|03:47 am] |
it's beena while since I've been on this thing
I've been kind of busy...and kind of lazy...and kind of boring!
I guess you could say that I've just been chillin'
nothing exciting going on with me
just taking a few pictures...click here to see!
I don't have a job right now...so I'm pretty much a bum!
I have no money and my credit cards are almost maxed out!
I need money...bad!
on a lighter note...I've been talking to this girl named O'Brianne...but everyone calls her Obee
she is a really great girl =] she makes me smile...a lot
I enjoy hanging out with her and talking to her
something that kind of went away with my ex...
speaking of which...has been trying to come back into my life
she always wants to hang out and such...
but I'm pretty sure that is pretty much code for having sex...
and I'm not about to let her break me down
not this time...not ever again
she was like a drug...
you know that it's not good for you...
but it starts to take over you...
making your world crumble around you...
there is nothing you can do...
you need your fix...
something so wrong...
but always seems to feel like the only thing that is right...
it makes you feel invincible...
even though it is the very thing breaking you into a million pieces...
I'm glad that I've gotten away
I'm living a lot happier now...
except for the being really broke part
other than that everything else is awesome!
I'm around music all of the time and photography too
I think things are starting to look up =] |
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| so lately.... |
[Mar. 8th, 2006|06:58 pm] |
things have been alright
I've just been so busy though
I work all night
sleep all day
and that's about it
when I don't have school
>.<
I can't wait for spring break!
I can't wait for summer!!!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 21st, 2006|04:03 am] |
I hate work...
my job title is food runner, but today...for some fucking unknown reason...I was washing dishes!
WTF???
That's not my job!
I was soooo pissed!
I hate the manager that put me on dishes...
they weren't even regular dishes...
no...
I had a to use a scraper and some nasty chemicals...
today was bullshit |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 11th, 2006|01:30 am] |
today was a good day
I actually got some sleep last night
I went to work
got some photo equipment from school
got my lip redone
went to a show
the equipment worked amazingly
hung out with mia
what else can I really say? |
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| omFg! |
[Feb. 9th, 2006|10:19 am] |
1 hour of sleep last night...
I'm gonna die!!!!
:[ |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 8th, 2006|11:31 pm] |
I actually got up and got to class today...
I didn't really want to get up though
school was alright
work was alright
I guess today was an alright day
but now I have calculus h.w.
I'm gonna die!
x.x |
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| not the best |
[Feb. 8th, 2006|01:55 am] |
today was not the best of days
since I didn't get off of work until 1am last night I was super tired
I end up waking up about noon!
wtf??
I missed school
then I had to go to work :[
my back hurts
I need to find a better job
but I talked to Dave from Camden...
I was asked to go with them on the Kiss & Tell tour this summer! :-D
that put a smile on my face
2 months of touring with the homies
and a lot of pictures along the way
I can hardly wait! |
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| I work in a bar? |
[Feb. 6th, 2006|02:41 pm] |
chem this morning
work tonight
and I'm working as a...Bar Porter??
wtf?
I'm not 21
and I sure as hell don't look anywhere near 21...lol
but w/e
if the casino thinks the odds are in their favor...haha |
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| I guess it wasn't the 2nd star to the left |
[Feb. 5th, 2006|03:33 am] |
well...i just got home...lol
I had originaly planned on staying the night...but I guess we didn't have a place to stay
the drive was alright...except for this big accident that turned the freeway into a parking lot for like half an hour
I talked to the people in the car behind me for a lil bit...
they asked where I was going...I said Neverland for a show
then the traffic cleared and everyone rushed back to their cars
Neverland is hard to find...
I thought Peter made the directions simple in the movie...
but neither him, nor mapquest really helped me find the venue itself...lol
I finally got there and Jon met me at the door and got me in
I said hi to everyone and unpacked my stuff
the show was awesome...and so much fun!!!
I ran into Tosha there
I met her like a week ago when I went to St. George with STUIT
she's cool :]
we hung out
I had to drive home after the show
I was a little tired...
but my friend Red helped me get through the drive...haha |
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| I'm off to Neverland |
[Feb. 4th, 2006|02:24 pm] |
hmm...last night...
went to First Friday
met up w/BCB
chilled...walked...ran!...into MIA :]
took some pics...
then I called Jeremy...he told me that he was @ the Venetian
so I went there
he had some friends that got a suite...
so we chilled...
had a little Wild Turkey
then walked the strip
it was funny...one of the girls was pretty freakin' wasted...
but I made sure she ate something and helped her get back to her room
NO...I did not take advantage of her...gosh...I'm not a dog...
after she got herself to bed, I sat down with some of the other peeps
and we had a lil' more Turkey and talked about Bright Eyes...<3!
other music too
I had a fun time for hanging out with people I had never met before...haha
I crashed there in a chair...
woke up this morning...
and took my ass to school...haha
photo class
it wasn't that bad
learned me some good useful stuff
then I came home and now I'm getting ready to go to Utah for a show
I hope I get some good pics tonight
wish me luck :] |
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| FFF |
[Feb. 3rd, 2006|04:17 pm] |
well...work was alright
I was able to leave like 2 hours early
I went by school and picked up a flash
I hope it works well this weekend
It's my first "first friday" today
I'm kinda excited and nervous
I don't know what to expect
but maybe I'll run into some friends :]
I'm takin' some promo shots for BCB
I hope they turn out alright
other than that...I guess I'll just go wherever the night takes me
oh yeah...show in Utah tomorrow!!!
I'm off to NEVERLAND
::directions to self::
2nd star to the left
straight ahead until morning |
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